I'm shopping for greeting cards in a grocery store, but having trouble finding the right one. They all just aren't quite right. Then I find one that is perfect on the front - nice! I open it up, and read through the inside, and it gets more and more insidious and strange, until it becomes offensive. The message is something sociopolitical, anti-gay or racist. Whoa.

I keep looking through the cards, and find another, with a different design but the same message. As I look at them, I notice that their printing quality is poor - the ink is blurry. Somebody obviously planted them here for the card shoppers to find.

I put the two cards in envelopes. They are unusually thick, as if made with too much paper, and not properly folded. I take them up to the checkstand to turn them over to the management.

When I get to the front of the line, I show the envelopes to the checker and explain that I found these inappropriate greeting cards, but when I open the envelopes all that comes out is a big stack of money.

But there were these cards, I tell her, and I will go find them. I remember what they look like. But I pass all the aisles, several times back and forth, and I can't find the greeting card section.